It’s only natural to occasionally feel unsure about your relationship. It’ll most certainly happen in the early days of dating when you’re still deciding if you’re right for one another. But it can also happen months or years down the line where one day you wake up and ask yourself, “Am I truly happy?”

While it can come as a shock, it isn’t a question you’ll want to ignore. In fact, “you should use the doubts and/or negative feelings you are having as a signpost indicating the need to take a pause and reflect,” Kate Engler, LMFT, a licensed marriage and family therapist, tells Bustle. Jonathan Bennett, relationship and dating expert at Double Trust Dating, echoes this. “If you are feeling uncertainty about a relationship, it’s important that you address the reasons for those feelings,” he tells Bustle. “Usually, it’s your gut telling you that there are unresolved problems.”